The following list was obtained from a leading national community service organization. We can all learn from it.

  1. Don’t attend meetings, but if you do, arrive late.
  2. Be sure to leave before the meeting is over and make sure everyone hears you leave.
  3. Sit in the back so you can talk with other members during the meeting.
  4. Never have anything to say at meetings; wait until you get outside, then always be negative.
  5. After meetings, find fault with club officers and fellow members.
  6. Hold back your annual dues as long as possible, or better yet, don’t pay at all.
  7. Never accept an office or serve on a committee. It is much easier to criticize than to do.
  8. When everything else fails, abuse the club’s officers.
  9. Don’t bother enlisting new members; let the others do it all.
  10. At meetings, agree to everything, then go home and do nothing.
  11. Don’t tell the club how its policy can help you, but if it doesn’t help you, tell everyone else it’s useless.
  12. Do nothing more than what’s necessary, but when other members roll up their sleeves and willingly use their ability to help matters along, complain that the club is being run by a clique or dictator.
  13. Talk cooperation but never cooperate.
  14. Get all that the club has to give but give nothing in return.
  15. Threaten to leave the club if something isn’t the way you want it.
  16. If you’re asked to help, always say you don’t have time.
  17. Never read any mailings or seek information. You might find out what’s going on.
  18. If appointed to a position, never devote any time to it. Let someone else do it all.
  19. Overlook your own shortcomings and concentrate on what they are not doing.
  20. Repeat all the unpleasant things about your club to anyone who will listen.
  21. Always criticize club officers whenever the opportunity arises.
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